Let me eat Cake (or indeed, anything at all)

After months of costly procrastination, I actually made it to the gym last week.  And then only because the Man shamed me into it.  If he can manage twice (at least) a week, surely I can go once in three months?  So off I went, dragging my reluctant ass, and came away feeling sore and shocked.  

Sore, because it’s the gym, and shocked, because it transpires that not only do I have no muscle-tone whatsoever, but in fact I possibly have no muscles whatsoever.  The weight indicator on the machines, starting at a not-overly-unrealistic 25kg, quickly, and embarrassingly, slid down to 5kg.  As in, I could only lift 5kg of weight above my head.  Which is, I’m assuming, not only because I’ve been avoiding the gym since last October (everybody knows that it’s bad to go to the gym during a pregnancy...) but perhaps also because I’ve fallen into the crap-eating habits trap that befalls most new(ish) mothers and so have no strength (either to pump iron, or to get inside the gym to so pump).

Out of curiosity I’ve made a mental note of everything I’ve eaten today – which has left me even more shocked than I was when I limped out of the gym:

·  One yoghurt and a bite of peanut-butter on  toast (I did intend to have entire thing but the Boy had other plans)

·  “Several” squares of chocolate (ah ok then, many many squares – but it was dark, Green & Black’s - so practically health food)

·  A quarter slice of bread with tuna mayo topping (stolen from the Boy’s lunchtime plate, and eaten straight after the chocolate – revolting, left me feeling ill for the rest of the day)

·  Spoonful of corn (ditto)

·  Flapjack and cup of tea.

Compare this to the Boy’s:

·  Toast x 2 (1 x his, 1 x mine), banana and yoghurt, apple juice, small cup of cocoa,  (breakfast)

·  Tuna mayo sandwich, cup of sweetcorn (minus a spoonful), bowl of broccoli soup, raspberry yoghurt (lunch)

·  Tomato and pepper risotto, mashed kiwi & banana (dinner)

·  Breadsticks, raisins, nuts (Various snacks)

My just-gone 2 yr old son eats not only twice as well as I do, but twice as much.  (It might also explain why he’s about 15 stone).

To try to balance out this dietary vacuum, I plan on making the recipe below for dinner tonight for the Man and I. It’s easy and tasty, takes 15 mins prep time – max – then cooks itself in about 20 mins.  Enough time for you to pour yourself a stiff I-made-it-through-another-day drink.  (And then another one.  Who says I’m not doing everything I can to get my strength up??)

Smoked Mackerel Chowder

You need:

·    Pack of vacuum-packed smoked mackerel, skinned and roughly torn (try not to eat too much while you’re prepping...)

·    1 x Onion, chopped

·    1 x pepper (any colour – I like red), chopped

·    Some paprika / smoked paprika / dried chilli (optional)

·    Some celery, carrots, potatoes (up to you how much, and depends on how many you’re cooking for – I go for 2 each of carrots and potatoes, and one stalk of celery) – all peeled and chopped / diced

·    Tin of sweetcorn, drained

·    About a litre of stock*

·    Parsley (if, like me,  you have some stuck to the bottom of the fridge)

Sautee the onion in some oil on a medium heat for a few minutes until soft.  If you want your finished dish to have a bit of a kick, add the paprika (a teaspoon) or chilli (as much as you want) and leave to fry for a minute or so. 

Add the celery, carrots and potatoes, leave to fry for a few minutes.  Once they stick to the pan, stir and add a dollop of stock, then leave to bubble until soft – about 5 more minutes.

Add the chopped pepper and tin of corn, then add enough stock to cover the ingredients. 

After 10 mins or so, taste – the vegetables should be soft and ready to eat.  Throw in the mackerel and the parsley and leave for 5 more minutes.

It’s fine to eat as it in now, tho I like to stick in the hand-held blender for a few seconds, just to thicken it slightly. 

Season, add more slimey parsley if that’s your thing, then eat – on its own, or with lovely buttery mashed potatoes (or less lovely brown rice). 

If you do manage to keep some for your lunch the next day, don’t let any offspring  get their fat paws on it.   

*Re stock – I may never have any food for anyone older than 3 to eat in the house, but I always have a tub of Marigold Bouillon powder in the cupboard.  In the olden days it was a perfect hangover cure, nowadays it’s used for more wholesome purposes.  Plus the goddesses that are Delia and Nigella swear by it.