An Eye for An Eye...

The Girl has teeth. Four, to be precise.  (You wait eight months for one tooth...) The indication that Something Was (Coming) Up manifested itself last weekend, when, no doubt furious at my plans to actually go out for a few hours of merriment – and worse, intentionally set about getting drunk -  she bade me a fond evening’s farewell by puking all over my sister’s newly cleaned carpets.  Twice.  (Defying the laws of both physics and nutrition, the volume brought up was about three times that ingested – how do babies do that?) 

Notwithstanding her obvious tactics to get me to stay in, I skipped out anyway (as much as one heavily laiden with guilt can skip), and got stuck into the booze. And yet... I didn’t properly get stuck in, because at the back of my mind a teeny eight-month-old voice was squawking “you’ll regret this...”.  And so it came to pass that I fell into bed, makeup perfectly (sort of) in place, at 1.30am, and had a rude awakening at 1.50am.  And again at 2.30am... 3am.... 4.30am... At 6am I called it a day and got up for good (although in truth, there was very little good about it at all).

We were in Dublin for the weekend – the sole purpose for which was my night out – and in order to maintain that this didn’t amount to one of my two annual Girls’ Weekends Away (3 consecutive days of sleep and drink, taken at any time, with any person, except those to whom I am bound by marriage or motherhood – a fiercely negotiated term of my parenting contract)  I had to bring one of the kids with me.  So I went for the one who I thought would be the easier option – the sweet, docile, easily portable (relatively speaking) Girl.  Plus I figured it’d be good to have some one-on-one time with her, right?

Not so right, as it turned out.  In fact the only time she smiled during the entire weekend was when we walked into the arrivals hall in the airport on Sunday evening, and the Boy bounded over to her and threw himself onto her pram, gibbering with relief that his family unit was whole again. Her distemper lifted only temporarily, and was such that I actually brought her, unprompted, to the doctor on Monday.  She diagnosed teeth and, she suspected, bronchiolitis, and so we were back to the antibiotics and ensuing (and on-going) multiple night wakings.  

Getting wind of a Girls’ Weekend Away, and worse – a trip to the doctors! – the Boy has been taking umbrage ever since.  He is now waking every night – at different times, just to keep us on our toes – demanding medical attention.  Seriously.  On Friday night he ordered me to “call the ambulance” because his hand was “stuck” (it was lying pathetically between the bars of the cot, a good two inches of space on either side of it.  He really needs to work on his supporting props).  “Take my temp-a-chure” he implored; I did, it was fine;  “Give me med-sin!” he pleaded;  I let him lick a spoon dipped in Calpol.  “See the doctor?” he begged. “Later. If you’re still sick tomorrow, we’ll see the doctor.  We’ll even go to hospital. Ok?”  It worked.  He went back to sleep, safe in the knowledge that his mummy would never ever lie to him.

As it turned out I wasn’t lying.  The next day I  - ME!!!  not him, or her, or the Man - ended up having not one, but two doctor appointments, and an urgent referral to hospital... Some horrible eye infection thingy, which is probably a virus, which probably came from the Girl, who probably picked it up on the plane last weekend.  Sigh. 

On the plus side, we came away from our weekend with more than just illnesses and hangovers.  Apart from spending time with our nearests and dearests, I stole this from my Mar, who presented me with a trough of it on my first night.  Simple, delicious, and definitely something to get your teeth into.  Even if you only have four of them.

Smoked Haddock in Creamy Sauce.

You need (for 2, as a main, or four as a starter):

• 500g / 1lb of smoked haddock (or cod) – skinned, deboned, and cut into bite-sized pieces.
• Tub of crème fraiche (250g or so) (half-fat is fine if the calories on the full version horrify you)
• A dozen (or so) cherry tomatoes, cut in half
• A bunch (6 – 8) spring onions, chopped.
• Two good handfuls of grated cheddar (about 200g)

Fry the fish in a little bit of oil for a couple of minutes, then add the tomatoes and the spring onions and cook for one minute or so.

Add the crème fraiche, stir, and bring to the boil.  Leave it to bubble for two minutes.

Pour into an oven-proof dish and sprinkle with the cheese.

Put under a hot grill until it bubbles. 

Serve immediately with steamed spinach, mashed potatoes, rice, pasta... or on its own.  Easy peasy lemon squeezy.